Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Can We Stop Now?

Calling each other stupid, that is.

I have four daughters, and I teach them that words like stupid and hate are just not nice words to use when you are talking about another person. I was taught this as a child, and so were all of my friends.
Now in the age of social media, here we are, grown adults...most of us parents, calling each other stupid.
We may not say it to each other's faces, or "walls" as the case may be. However, in any given day my news feed is filled with friends talking about "stupid people". It's everywhere...all over pinterest, twitter, everywhere. Now I realize that when most people use the term, they are not talking about someone they know personally. But I think it's spreading to that. When I first started seeing it, it was describing someone who made the news by making what we would call a "stupid" choice. Fair enough, I can live with that. But more and more I'm seeing it to describe people closer to home. ""Blank" is tired of dealing with stupid people all day" is one status I'm seeing more and more.
And it makes me wonder, if all of us are complaining about stupid people, who are they? Not all of us are supremely smarter than each other...so SOMEONE has to be the stupid person, right?
No examples jump to mind right now, but I've seen statuses or tweets describing something "stupid" that someone did...and then the person posting the status rants on and on about it. All the while, I'm sitting on this side of my computer screen cringing because it's similar to a mistake I've made in the past. I've made some doozies of mistakes, people. Does that make me one of the stupid people everyone talks about? I don't always think things all the way through, and I'm quite forgetful.

I have pretty good self confidence, and I don't think of myself as stupid in any way, but it does make me wonder. I've seen people called stupid for everything from their ability to organize a large event, to their driving (which reminds me of a quote I saw years ago..."deep down, we all believe we are a better than average driver), to their parenting choices.
If our three year olds were being, well, three year olds and calling all of the other preschoolers around them stupid, almost every adult I know would put a stop to it. Even if they didn't say it to their face, but while driving home from play group said, "so and so is stupid", what would we as a parent tell them in response? We definitely wouldn't say, "well, some people are just stupid...you just have to learn to cut the stupid people out of your life, honey."

Maybe it's time for us as adults to play nice. I think so.

Maybe the next time we want to use social media as an outlet to rant about a peer, we should keep in mind that "what Suzy says of Sally says more about Suzy than Sally", and try and understand where people are coming from...or just keep our mouths and keyboards quiet :)

Isn't this what we are working so hard to teach our children?


  1. Could. Not. Agree. More.

    Well said! Er. Written.

  2. Thank you for this reminder. I believe we all need to stop and think before we act.
    I just stopped by from That Friday Blog Hop to spread some love. I'm glad I did. Following everywhere. :)


Your comments make me smile :)


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